An engineer finds himself in an unfortunate accident and he winds up at the pearly gates. St. Peter is looking over his face fades into a frown. “Oh, you’re an engineer. I’m terribly sorry but the papers say you’re supposed to be going to hell – the door down is over there.”
Well reluctantly the engineer makes his way down and they let him through the gate, but the conditions are even worse than he imagined: there is no running water or electricity, you have to walk everywhere you go, and of course it’s as hot as hell in there.
The engineer decides that if he is going to be here for an eternity then he may as well start fixing the place up, and he sets out to start making improvements. Before long the denizens of hell find themselves with more luxuries than they could ever have imagined: escalators, flush toilets, and the place has even got working air conditioning.
Pretty soon the engineer has become a rather popular guy, and it’s looking like hell might not be such a bad place after all; he’s even on a first name basis with the devil himself.
One day God makes a collect call down to Satan and he says in a cheeky voice, “Lucy my boy, how’s it going down there in hell? How about that heat, huh?”
“Oh hey there, it’s nice of you to check in. You know hell is going pretty good these days, we’ve got escalators and running water, and we even have some AC keeping the place cool. I’m telling you, can’t wait to see what this engineer thinks up next!”
God can’t believe what he’s hearing. “WHAT!? You have an engineer down there? This must be some kind of mistake; you need to send him back up right away!
“No way,” Satan replies, “I like having an engineer on staff, and besides, Dave is a pretty fun guy to talk to.”
God get’s furious. “Send him back up here right this instant or I’ll be taking you to court!”
Lucifer laughs uncontrollably. “Oh yeah, right, and just where do YOU think you’re going to find a lawyer.”